You’re Not Crazy—You’re Coping: Understanding Trauma Responses

Have you ever felt like something was off, but couldn’t quite put your finger on it? Or maybe you’ve been told that you’re “overreacting” or “too sensitive”? If you’ve experienced trauma—especially sexual trauma, abuse, or chronic stress—those feelings are not only valid, they’re a normal part of your coping mechanisms.

When trauma happens, it doesn’t just affect you mentally—it impacts your entire nervous system. It alters the way you respond to situations, people, and even your own emotions. But here’s the most important thing you need to hear: You’re not crazy. You’re coping.

Understanding how trauma shows up in your life is the first step toward reclaiming your peace. You’re not broken. You’re human. And there are scientifically-backed reasons why your body and mind react the way they do.

🧠 The Four Main Trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn

Our bodies and minds don’t just react to trauma with “thinking”—they go into survival mode. This means your body and mind react automatically to keep you safe, even if you’re no longer in danger. This is known as trauma responses.

Let’s break down the four main trauma responses you might be experiencing:

⚔️ Fight

The “fight” response happens when we feel we need to protect ourselves or stand up against something that feels threatening. It might look like:

• Feeling hyper-alert or irritable

• Getting defensive or aggressive

• Having a strong urge to control situations

If you’re a fighter, you might be constantly ready to defend yourself, even if no one is attacking. This is the body’s natural way of reacting to fear, but it doesn’t always serve us long-term.

🏃🏾‍♀️ Flight

The “flight” response is when we feel the need to run from danger—whether that’s physically, mentally, or emotionally. It might look like:

• Avoiding conflict or uncomfortable situations

• Running from your emotions or your past

• Overworking to distract yourself from pain

If you’re a flighter, you may avoid situations or people that remind you of your trauma. But over time, avoidance can build tension and make the trauma harder to confront.

❄️ Freeze

When we freeze, we feel unable to move or react. It’s a response to trauma where the body literally becomes immobilized. It might look like:

• Feeling numb or detached

• Going into “shut down” mode

• Feeling paralyzed or stuck in life

If you’re in freeze mode, you might feel like you can’t make decisions or get out of situations that drain you. Freezing is the body’s response to feeling overwhelmed and powerless.

🫂 Fawn

The “fawn” response is when we try to please others or “keep the peace” to avoid conflict or danger. It might look like:

• People-pleasing to gain approval

• Sacrificing your needs to meet others' expectations

• Overthinking how others perceive you

If you fawn, you might have learned to prioritize other people’s comfort over your own. It’s a survival mechanism that develops when we’ve experienced threats or manipulation. But over time, it can lead to resentment and burnout.

🧘🏾‍♀️ Why Understanding Your Trauma Response Matters

Understanding which trauma response you most often default to is liberating. Because when you can identify your automatic reactions, you can learn how to interrupt them and create healthier coping mechanisms.

Instead of feeling like you’re “crazy” for having these responses, you can begin to see them for what they are:Tools your body created to protect you.

But here’s the thing: Just because these responses served you once doesn’t mean they should continue to dictate your life. Over time, they can get in the way of true healing and peace.

🌱 How to Start Healing Your Trauma Responses

Here are some strategies to begin shifting these responses:

1. Awareness

The first step is always awareness. When you feel yourself reacting strongly to a situation, ask yourself:What response am I having right now—fight, flight, freeze, or fawn?Simply acknowledging the response is powerful.

2. Self-Compassion

Stop beating yourself up for how you cope. These responses were formed in times of pain, and they served a purpose. Be gentle with yourself as you begin to heal and rewire your responses.

3. Grounding Techniques

When you feel triggered, use grounding exercises to return to the present moment. Try breathing deeply, feeling your feet on the ground, or using affirmations like:

• “I am safe right now.”

• “This is not the same situation.”

4. Therapy and Support

Engage in trauma-informed therapy where you can work through your responses in a safe environment. If you’re not already in therapy, now might be a good time to reach out to someone who specializes in trauma healing.

🌸 A Final Thought

Healing is about coming back home to yourself. And sometimes, that means unraveling the ways you’ve learned to survive, so you can learn to thrive.

Your responses are not a sign that you’re broken. They’re a sign that you’ve been through a lot—and you’re still standing. That is resilience.And that is something to be proud of.

So take a deep breath.You are healing.You are not crazy.You are coping.And you are getting stronger every day.

🤍—Taylor