Why would I hire a doula that can't attend my birth?

With restrictions in hospital settings around maternity care, it's no surprise that your Doula might have to phone in, FaceTime your partner or even attend your checkups virtually. You might be wondering why would I hire a doula then. Maybe you are even questioning the role of the doula. Great, I get it - You hire a doula to support you through your labor, right? But is that all a doula does?

The short answer is no. A huge part of the role of a doula is to help you and your family prepare. The goal is after working with your doula through your pregnancy (prenatal visits) that you should feel empowered to labor and birth alone with the support of your birth partner (of your choice) and your doula as a guide and safety net.

I won't lie, holding space for my clients virtually has been the most difficult part of this journey. I felt guilty at times about being able to attend their birth, but then my mentor reminded me that I am still holding space for them just in a different way. I felt guilty for not being able to see them as often as I would like, but then I was reminded by MY CLIENT that LIFE happens and I am a full time student too. Providing virtual doula support reminded me of how much I truly am capable of supporting someone just a phone call away. Knowing that my client's partners were able to support their birthing partner while I was on the phone was everything I needed to reassure me that I can do this virtual doula thing.

So what might virtual doula support look like? Well, you can read the rest on my blog, but for now:

💛Liaising with medical staff (including midwives, nurses, exit nurses, lactation specialist, and physicians) and being on hand to assist with the decision making

💛Supporting your birth partner (especially during a c-section this can be helpful). The doula can help answer your partner(s) questions (especially while their birthing partner may be in the operation room), guide your partner with massage techniques or how to help maintain comfort or adjustments

💛Maintaining a video call (FaceTime or Zoom)

💛Being on call ready to answer any of your texts, phone calls, voice-notes, etc during your time at the Hospital

💛Guiding with meditation, breathing techniques, affirmations, or even movement such as dancing, squats, walking, showering, etc

Have you benefited from virtual doula support? Let me know in the comments and be sure to check out this week's blog post.

💛 Helping partner prepare meals or restock hospital bag (if stay is extended)

💛 Helping to plan and organize childcare for other children at home while parents are in the hospital

💛Ordering food or making comfort care packages, boxes, or tips

During the prenatal visits, I make it known to my clients that I am able to support THEM and make their birthing experience as calm and stress free as possible. In our prenatal sessions (and sometimes after because the work of a Doula never stops), we talk about creating a birthing team (who they want/don’t want in the room, their must-haves, hospital bag, labor techniques, and measures that make them feel calm and supported. The prenatal visits are the crucial part of the Doula experience because the goal is for all parties to feel PREPARED when they begin the birth. It is even more important that both client and Doula remain open and communicative during these sessions if at some point during the client’s labor or birthing experience that the Doula has to attend virtually.

If you are interested in hiring me for your Doula services, please click the link in my bio to book a service and consult with me.